Due to the “controversy” over the cover of Baby Talk magazine, I’ve been inspired to repost something that I wrote on August 27, 2004. Apparently, women (WOMEN!) are “shocked”, “embarrassed”, and “offended” over the image of a “GIANT BREAST” on the cover.
The quote I found most shocking came from the mother of a 4 month old.
“Gross, I am sick of seeing a baby attached to a boob.”
Gross? Really? A baby drinking from it’s mothers breast is GROSS?
Right, because the true purpose of The Boobs is for men to drool over and suck on during sex. So, a baby using the breast for that HORRIFYING ACT of drinking the milk that sustains their life is DISGUSTING AND HOW IN THE HELL COULD THEY PUT THAT FILTH ON THE COVER OF A MAGAZINE THAT MA’MAN MIGHT SEE?
I have no tolerance for women with this kind of attitude towards breastfeeding. I suppose I can deep within myself and try to understand people feeling uncomfortable with breastfeeding. But to use words like “gross” and “horrified” when speaking of breastfeeding is shocking to me, ESPECIALLY coming from a woman. The fact that there are people out there who can’t get past the sexualization of the breasts and view them purely as a sexual object is more “disgusting” to me than a picture of a baby sucking the milk from the GIANT BREAST of it’s mother.
Speaking of GIANT BREASTS. I now give you the archived breastfeeding post (WITH PICTURES! OF A GIANT BREAST!)
A few minutes after Gabriella was born, the nurse handed her to me. I kissed her and decided to try to feed her. I unbuttoned my hospital gown and brought her to my breast. She latched on immediately. I’ll never forget that moment. There in my arms was my daughter and she looked right at me while she began to eat for the first time in her life from my breast, the milk that would sustain her for the first few months of her life. I couldn’t believe how easily she took to the breast. Both of my boys had trouble in the beginning, learning how to latch on and it was very frustrating. But not with my daughter, she figured it out right away and feeding her has never been frustrating.
Infact, words can not describe what an amazing and fufilling experience it is everytime I sit down to nurse her.
I love how her beautiful little eyes will focus on me while she’s eating and drifting off to sleep. I love the sounds she makes, the coos, the grunts, the gulping, hell, I even love the way she farts while she’s sucking away. It’s the funniest thing in the world.
The love, the sense of importance, the bond I feel when I’m nursing my daughter is one of the most precious gifts in my life.
And let’s be honest here, the fact that I can get out of the shower, run out of the bathroom and start squirting Tony with MILK is pretty damn cool too.
Well, you can only guess how I feel about this! My nursing boobs are all over the internet right now, but I think I’ll post some more, damnit.
That’s what breasts are made for, dammit! Anything else is secondary. Hmph.
I am from Europe, and when I first moved to the States I was shocked that women cover their nursing babies with a blanket, so this response doesn’t surprise me, it is very sad though
This must be the “subject du jour”. I’ve just read/commented on 2 blogs about the same issue “breastfeeding” and the infamous picture on the “BabyTalk” magazine.
Coming from an Asian country, I could never understood why some American women made such a big deal about nursing in public. They can make out publicly with a man in a gross way, but nursing your baby is offensive?
They’re lucky there are formulas available in this country, but in other poor countries…nursing is the ONLY option and it’s the only food source a baby will receive, either at home or wherever the mom is working at that moment, be it the rice fields or a farm.
I’m glad I’m not alone. I posted a blog about this exact topic! The repression and lack of maturity about something as natural as breastfeeding in this country is unbelievable.
The fact that mothers are offended or grossed out by a nursing baby makes me sick.
What is wrong with these people? Didn’t they give birth?
the line from the article — “There is a real puritanical streak in America…” — sums it up for me. It’s wrong to breastfeed your baby in public, but it’s perfectly ok to use boobs to sell BEER.
Related Aside: Family gathering, 20 yrs ago, I was breastfeeding my infant, in a booth, in a restaurant, with a blanket over his head & my shoulder. My husband was next to me blocking most of the view. The maitre’d came over to the table and asked me I would please do that in the bathroom because it was upseting some of the patrons. I asked him (loudly) if those patrons would like to eat their dinner in the bathroom just like they expected my son to eat his in the bathroom. He left us alone after that. From that point going forward, I stopped worrying about what other people think about my breastfeeding – because most of them are idiots.
I honestly can’t believe there’s a raging debate about that cover. Our culture is beginning to make the Victorians look like sexually liberated hippies.
I admit, being pregnant freaks me out — it’s ugly and scary and nobody can ever really prepare you for it — but it’s all worth it, to have that little person looking up at you.
I agree (with everyone else) that there’s a HUGE double-standard going on. Boobs are slathered on men’s magazines, car magazines, even the cover of some women’s magazines… and this! THIS! is considered gross??
PS – I love that this came up after all the boobtalk on RSM’s Flickr.
beautiful, Y.
While the idea of breastfeeding a kid myself freaks me out a little, I think it’s pretty neat, in general. I was flying back to the US from Amsterdam a few years ago, and the young lady sitting next to me whipped one out and started nursing right there in her seat. I was a little surprised, but I thought it was *really* cool that she didn’t have that stigma and embarrassment that American women have been given. And hey, the baby didn’t cry the whole time! Bonus!!
The complaints about that magazine cover that crack me up the most, are the ones that say “I don’t want my 14 year old son seeing that.” Ha! Like your 14 year old son doesn’t have a stack of Hustlers between his mattresses.
I also can’t believe women are calling it “disgusting” and “offensive” and I think it’s really pretty ridiculous. There is a bizarre puritanical thing in this country. It’s particularly noticeable sometimes up here in Massachusetts where the state votes so democratic in national elections that it’s a joke, but we always have a crazy republican governor.
Anyway, I’m glad the magazine says it’s not discouraged by the reaction because that’s insanity.
THANK YOU! I read the article and actually was stunned for a minute, thinking it had to be a joke! I’m speechless to think that anyone, especially a mother, could find that “gross.”
Go, y!
I posted about this last week and I’m not even a mother. It completely stunned me that MOTHERS/WOMEN were having this reaction to it. It’s a nursing baby. On the cover of a PARENTING magazine. Not People. Not Cosmo. A parenting magazine. But I guess looking at Pamela Anderson’s totally real and natural boobs on US! is perfectly acceptable.
I saw all that controversy too, and MY GOD people! Some stupid lady even said she had to turn the magazine face down on her coffee table for “FEAR” of her husband getting a glimpse of it! Can you believe? People are ridiculous…
When I saw the magazine article I was outraged by how perfect that breast was! Not what it was doing. I was so jealous. Beautiful booby.
I was in the bookstore the other day and turned the aisle to see a bare boobie with a baby attached. It was pretty refreshing. I was glad it happened.
Your boys had trouble latching on because they had their penises whacked with a scalpal and were upset and confused about that arbitrary event, so they weren’t so interested in eating.
I posted about this awhile back. Unreal, isn’t it?
Reading that article really steamed my ass.
Puritanical streak? HAHAHAAA !! Is that dumbass living in the same USA that I am??! LOL
I hope to breastfeed if this child ever decides to COME OUT … and if I do it in public and anyone even so much as gives me a second glance…it ain’t gonna be pretty…
You took the words right out of my mouth Y. I totally agree with you.
I’ve read about this a lot around the interwebs in the last few weeks, and what bothers me more than the idiotic women who think it’s gross, are the agressively judgemental breastfeeders. I breastfed my daughter for a year, but I accept that it is not right for everyone.
Beautiful, beautiful photos of your daughter nursing. I wish I had one of my son and I nursing.
I rarely breastfed in public, mostly because my son was a “latch on, latch off” kid and it was so hard to keep my boobs from spraying everyone within a 6 foot radius with my milk (he’d suck until I let down, then pop off to look around, then latch back on). I never figured out why he did that, but it continued until I weaned him at 9 months.
I can’t even comment intelligently on this insane response to the Baby Talk cover because the idea of breastfeeding as “gross” or “offensive” is just, well, insane. And the fact that it’s WOMEN saying this? Really? I just can’t even process that. What is WRONG with these people?
I’m 100% with you on this one. Let me know if you ever want to run for office or something. 😉
It’s not gross, it is beautiful, as long as they aren’t old enough to go to school when you are doing it then I take issue, that is just too weird.
Great pics!
I agree with CNL: Anyone who complains about breastfeeding in public should eat their meals in a toilet cubicle.
Go breastfeading Mums!
The photos of you breastfeeding are gorgeous.
Here here! I am right there with you. The stupidity of people amaze me. How can feeding your child be gross???? How??? Its rewarding! Thank you for sharing your beautiful thoughts…and pictures. 🙂
You know, it’s really just Americans. We’re grossed out and offended by everything. Fucking prudes.
If I was President, I’d have tits EVERYWHERE! My campaign buttons would be pictures of underboob. Your underboob, though – as yours would get way more votes than mine.
For crying out loud. I nursed all six of mine and shoot I am still proud of these suckers. I truly believe that America lives by a duble standard. GROW UP. Boobies are beautiful!
so happy you posted this.
i find that the people with me are more concerned about being embarrassed than i am. be it my mother, my sister, or my boyfriend.
i tend to bring it up but then cover up, to make them feel better. and then i rant a bit about how puritanical and stupid american culture can be.
and i feel ashamed a bit, that i accomadate them this way.
I completely agree with you. Breastfeeding is really beautiful, and it irritates me to no end when people act stupid about it. I, personally, can’t wait to breastfeed. 🙂
Yeah, I find it’s mostly an American hang up.
Everywhere else is cool with the ta tas. 😀
I was at a bridal shower with Da Bebe this weekend. It wasn’t that big and really, I knew 90% of the people there. (All women.)
Sam got hungry and I started getting ready to feed him (WITH A BLANKET!) and someone asked “Are you really going to do THAT right here?”
Uhhhh…..YES.
See, I don’t even GET THAT kind of attitude. You’re feeding your baby, where the hell are you supposed to go to do it?
Some woman on a message board actually said that women shouldn’t breastfeed in public because it’s “called being a lady.”
Ummmmmmm. There isn’t anything more ladylike than breastfeeding a child. Dumbass.
I HATE that it’s treated like some kind of perverted behavior. AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
LOVE the pictures! 🙂
I put mine on my blog, too.
I agree with you, Y, and everyone else: breastfeeding is not “disgusting”, it’s the most natural thing around.
My husband would get uncomfortable with me nursing our youngest in church. But hey! He’s hungry and he’s going to start crying if he doesn’t get to nurse now! Plus we were in the children’s room, so it’s not a big deal. With my first, I’d go into a bedroom if people were over, but with the second, I wasn’t going to leave the conversation just because the baby was hungry. That made me feel left out. And for no reason.
What really burns me is that most of these “dissenters” were probably nursed as babies. Hypocrites.
This was brought up on another board I frequent. The quote that really stuck in my craw was the one about the mom getting rid of the the issue because her 13 yo son “doesn’t need to see that”. WTF? Way to perpetuate the whole boobs as sex objects thing rather than explain to her son the reason. Sheesh!
I knew nothing about this article until my husband forwarded it to me. He was even more outraged by it than I was. He was very supportive of breastfeeding – it was free, for crying out loud, and he’s the World’s Cheapest Man.
I used to cover up while breastfeeding in public, as I didn’t want to risk freaking out perfect strangers with my enormous boobs (I was a freakin’ H cup while I was nursing).
Thank you for your post. I don’t usually tear up at the sight of another woman’s breast, but your writing made me melt a little. I am just starting the weaning process with my little one, and all this breastfeeding hoopla is really getting old. Thank you for your post and reminding people that breast feeding is not only natural, but beautiful.
I LOVE this post! I so totally agree with you about the sexualization of breasts being just fine, but godforbid they should be glorified for what they were truly intended. Women offended by that have serious issues, IMO. Also, I read that magazine for the first time about a week ago, when I found out I am pregnant!!! For the first time!! I’m 33!! I just had to share, and shout, GO GIRL! Because I totally agree with everything you said.
And, by the way, I totally plan to have my boob out breastfeeding in public every chance I get! LOL!!
Look what I just found: Breastfeeding Gallery
Oh Sonja! Thanks for that link. Looking through those pics, I started to tear up (it’s been 9 years since I last nursed), remembering all those funny (finger up the nose..) & tender moments.
First of all, beautiful post and even more beautiful photos.
I’m still steaming over this same kind of bullshit from when the Fred Meyers store asked a woman to stop nursing because it made patrons uncomfortable. WHAT?
In short, people REALLY need to get over their boobs = boner mentality and think back to a time when humans were too busy trying to SURVIVE to concern themselves with perverse and perverted notions about body parts and recall that a woman had no other way to feed her offspring except with her “disgusting” breasts.
IDIOTS!
I’m with you. And for the record I love GIANT BOOBIES. =)
Bless you for writing this. I had a failed breastfeeding relationship with my Son and I am STILL apalled by the WOMEN! that think breastfeeding is teh evil. I’ve now worked through the issues (and oh, the guilt) surrounding our problems and have been surrounding myself with many a wonderful breastfeeding Mamma so that, in hopes of another child, I can have a successful relationship this time around. That said, our hospital sucks and does not help or promote breastfeeding AT ALL. Boo.
Such prudes! What is wrong with these people?! It’s just a boob for crying out loud!
Are you kidding me? Mothers were/are offended by that picture on the cover? Seriously?
WTF?
Beautiful post. I absolutely love the pictures of your nursing baby, there is nothing like looking down at their tiny little faces, watching them watch you while they nurse. Wish I had taked some shots from that angle. One of the sweetest moments in motherhood.
Breastfeeding my kids was one of the best things I’ve ever done as a mom.
And I did it EVERYWHERE!
Love the pictures and the story. Just beautiful.
I nursed my daughter everywhere from restaurants to malls to college football and basketball games, to standing in lines for event tickets, to CHURCH. (The church one was the ONLY time my husband ever got a little twitchy–I just asked him, “Hey, just WHO do you think invented this system ANYWAY?” And besides, NO ONE noticed.)
For the entire two and a half years that she chose to nurse, I was positively SPOILING for a fight. For SOMEONE to object, to say something to me, to look at me crossways. It never happened. Ever. And I live in rural Arkansas, not exactly THE most progressive area of the country. I think my frustration at never getting to “have it out” in a publick breastfeeding smackdown (and BOY, was I ever prepared! I was like Y and aerobic dance, baby!) is a big part of the reason that reading things like this magazine flap really piss me off so much now.
ROFL at the last line.
You go, girl. 🙂
I stumbled across this site by accident, but very thankful I did. Nursing a child is the most beautiful thing a woman can do. As a father of more than a few, I always loved seeing my babies nursing, and was in no way disgusted or offended. As far as sex, it can be quite fantastic to suck that wonderful stuff from your woman. Whether anyone wants to admit it or not an adult can benefit from it. I didn’t even catch cold for YEARS when I helped out with that lactating momma. I wish I had access to a set right now! You get relief and I get HEALTHY! Just a guy who knows the benefits of a womans milk, for babys health,nothing better! Think people! way back before companies produced all this fake crap, it was all natural and no one thought twice!!
I’ve been reading this issue of Baby Talk all afternoon and didn’t notice the cover until I read this Blog.
I certainly don’t have a problem with it. And, maybe if we saw things like this more often it wouldn’t be such a big deal.
Could anything be more natural? Now, of course, don’t think I haven’t had to fight off a blush when someone unexpectedly begins to breastfeed while I’m in a conversation with them.
But, I still think it’s great.
Y~
I’m so glad you did this post, and it reminded me of years ago, when I was waitressing…
A lady was seated in my section (bay window.. corner seat), and my manager came to me (male chauvenist), telling me, “You need to tell “that woman” she can’t do that (breastfeed her child)here.”
I replied, “Uh, I’m not telling her anything! She’s covered up where nobody can see her, and that’s what God gave women boobs for! Not for men’s pleasure! If you’re Man enough to tell her to leave, go for it, and when she sues your ass, I’ll be stiing next to her in court!”
I had just had my first child too, and although I didn’t breast feed, I was still offended that he had the balls to tell me what I needed to do!!Needless to say, I quit that job soon after that!!
You have a beautiful family, and wish I had the ability to write the way you do… You are talented, beautiful, both inside and out but it’s the inner beauty that makes the outer more beautiful!
~hugz~
Karyn