Melancholy
1.Sadness or depression of the spirits.
2.Pensive reflection or contemplation.
When you lose just about every friend you have, there comes a point where you have to face reality and deal with the fact that you're the one with the problem. Everyone else can't be wrong and you be the only one right. So I have to figure out what my problem is and fix it. I can't live like this. I have a best friend in my husband, I have two kids who love me and family all around me, but I miss having friends to do things with. I miss getting phone calls and invitations to go hang out and have a cup of coffee, or to go see a movie. I miss laughing with people about things we've done in the past. I miss the connection I used to have with so many people.
I hate this feeling of being all alone. The loneliness is starting to eat away at me.
And the fact that I brought this loneliness and isolation upon myself is killing me.
I'll be doing much soul searching and making lots of changes in the days to come because I refuse to repeat the past and wallow in my sorrow. As hard as it is to look inside of myself, admit where I've been wrong and do what I need to fix it, it has to be done so that I can move on and find peace in this area of my life.
"I have a best friend in my husband, I have two kids who love me and family all around me, but I miss having friends to do things with."
I so understand where you are coming from. I really hope you find the answers that you are looking for.