While standing in the diaper isle at Target, trying to find my daughters size, I noticed a man looking (staring, actually) at me with a disturbed look on his face. Clearly, he wasn't thinking "Damn, she's hot" or anything like that. It was more of a "what in the hell" kind of look. I was trying to remain calm and not be all "What's your problem, beyotch?" Then, I realised what he was looking at and why he was so frightened...
I was playing with my belly. That's right, apparently, I play with my belly in public. When I say "play with", I mean my hands are all up on my gut and I touch it, rub it, hold it while jiggling it around, sometimes, I gently tap it while I'm looking around. Like an old man showing off his beer gut in an attempt to make everyone laugh, only, I'm not an old man, and I'm certainly not trying to show anything off, nor? Am I trying to be funny.
Now that I'm aware of it, I have to fight the urge to PLAY WITH MY GUT. It's not a big deal when I'm at home. Hell, I make music on it while it's hanging out here in the privacy of my own home, but doing it in public? That's just sick.
But how does one break such a habit? What do I do when I start feeling the urges to grab that sack of fatty goodness where babies once grew and start feeling it up whilst out in the real world? Tap dance instead? Randomly sock people in the head?
I suppose it could have been worse, I could have been talking to it.
Hey, I'm all for socking people in the head. Most of the people deserve it, whether they realize it or not, and should be grateful you took the time to hit them