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August 23, 2005
If you squeeze him hard, will beans not drop from his ass?

My husband is Mexican.

His mother is Mexican. His father (whoever in the hell HE is) was Mexican. The man was born in Mexico.

What I'm trying to say is that he is straight up, 100% PURE MEXICAN.

So, can someone please explain to me why he talks like a southern'r? PLEASE?

He love to fish. When he's going to go fishING, he says "I'ma take the boys Fish'n" And I'm like "you mean fish-ING" and he's all "Yeah, fish'n"

Same with huntING. "I'm going to get my HUH'tn license." I'm all "you mean HUNT-ING" and he's all "yeah, HUH'tn."

Some more examples.

Him : I'm 'unna take out a hunderd dollars
Me: you mean ONE HUNDRED?
Him: Yeah, a hundERD.

Him: I'm 'unna take a gander...
Me: you mean take a look at?
Him: Yeah, take a gander
ME: YOU ARE A MEXICAN FER CRYIN' OUT LOUD. MEXICANS DO NOT SAY "TAKE A GANDER"!

I bring this up now because the couple we went to the Improv with on Saturday night are from North Carolina. The husband? Has a very STRONG accent.

MY HUSBAND WAS IN HEAVEN. He let LOOSE with his fake accent and got totally KAH-RAAAAAZY with The Twang. It was so embarassing.

He was all "How was the Wed'n?" (wedding) "I loves me some Merle HaggERD" Then? He BROKE OUT INTO A TWANGY MERLE SONG IN THE RESTAURANT. (I hit him. I had to. He had to be stopped.)

Don't misunderstand me. I have nothing against southern accents. I just don't understand why my PURELY MEXICAN husband who had never lived in the south feels that he must talk with one.

Damn country music.


Posted by Y at August 23, 2005 12:43 PM
Comments

Maybe he's from South Mexico?


Bahahahahaha!

I crack me up :)

Posted by: Girl at August 23, 2005 04:26 PM

That is so funny. You type an awesome representation the accents around here!

Posted by: Kat at August 23, 2005 04:58 PM

You need to hear my family. I have a cousin who can take a full 30 seconds to pronounce "expedition" which is the kind of automobile they have...and she is 10!

Posted by: Jerri Ann at August 23, 2005 06:08 PM

I just can't laughing. Your husband. You gotta luv h'm.
At a family reunion several decades back, someone told my mother that spoke with an accent. She turned to me and asked, "Do I have an accent?" I said."No. Do I have an accent?" Soon everyone at our table was asking each other whether or not they spoke with an accent.
Hmm, guess you had to be there. It was funny at the time.

Posted by: mr.c at August 23, 2005 06:12 PM

I married a yankee and when I moved him back to Texas he couldn't understand anyone. But after 3 years, he's getting an accent of his own. (He's almost a full blown redneck.)

Posted by: NinaKaye at August 23, 2005 06:20 PM

I'm a born and raised Yankee, but living in TX for a couple years has given me a southern accent (decidedly not redneck, though). My Northeastern accent does come out in full force when I'm angry, though. Oh, and when I say "Good, how are you?" according to my husband. I think he's just crazy.

Posted by: Crystal at August 23, 2005 06:27 PM

Thats too funny.

Posted by: Annie at August 23, 2005 06:50 PM

haha does he say "i reckon", "over yonder", and "ya'll"? becuase without those, it's only imitation southern. i would know because i have been stubbornly resisting all forms of southern dialect for 10 years living in virginia, and i do NOT say those words.

Posted by: geeky at August 23, 2005 07:34 PM

here's the true test.

Does he say Wednesdee
or
Tuesdee
or how about
Saturdee

Because I do.

Posted by: Snidget at August 23, 2005 08:05 PM

When he says "yonder", like, "I see sum cows ovur yonder" (over there)..

THEN you know. :)

Posted by: TrishieRains at August 24, 2005 06:10 AM

Just make sure he never says "I'm fixin' ta go ta town."

Posted by: tammy at August 24, 2005 06:46 AM

I love your blog! Its hilarious – a great antidote to a boring work day. I understand the accent problem completely. I have family from the south (I’m from New York), and I can barely understand them. It’s a completely different language down south. I’m sure they feel the same about my Yankee accent though.

Thanks for the laughs!

Posted by: Trista at August 24, 2005 07:30 AM

I'm southern, and i say ya'll and fixin and huh (all drawn out) and a whole bunch-a-other words that come so natural to me, i cant single 'em out.

Hey- and we huuuunt and fiiiiiiish too!
We live for hun'tn season and fishin' on the river.

What else is there? I think your husband sounds like a mighty fine man!

Posted by: Heatherg at August 24, 2005 07:42 AM

Hey, I'm Canadian (French and Irish) and I sometimes say y'all.

And?
I love Merle Haggard.

Okay, embarassing confessions time OVER.

Posted by: Louise at August 24, 2005 08:49 AM

I aint got nuthin' against MURRRL, seriously, he's great. I only got sumthin' against my MEXICAN husband talking like a southern'r.

BECAUSE HE'S MEXICAN!

Posted by: Y at August 24, 2005 08:52 AM

Please do not dis Merle. I love that man and would have his babies. They wouldn't be cute but they would come out singin' jail songs.

Find out if your hubby is saying ya'll or you'all. I hear lots of people "faking" an accent and this is their fatal mistake. It is never you'all it is ALWAYS ya'll.

My ex-inlaws used to call potatoes, "Taters". That pretty much constituted divorce right there. Dumb okies. Not all Okies are dumb but they are the ones giving the rest a bad name.

Posted by: D at August 24, 2005 08:58 AM

Ok, last time...

I AM NOT DISSING MERLE. I AM DISSING MY FAKE ACCENTED MEXICAN BORN IN MEXICO HUSBAND.

Posted by: Y at August 24, 2005 09:03 AM

Oh and D? Thanks for reminding me, he TOTALLY says "taters".

Posted by: Y at August 24, 2005 09:04 AM

I still wanna know if you got any beans to come out of his ass??

Posted by: April at August 24, 2005 09:40 AM

(I didn't think you were dissing Merle-- I just get jumpy when anyone else from our generation has even heard of him. My parents were going to name me after one of his songs. I'm not sure how lucky I am that they didn't) I think it's hilarious (if somewhat disturbing) that Tony is doing this accent. Is it ALL THE TIME? Or just with the Southern folk? And has he ALWAYS done this, or is it a new thing? Because it might be time for an intervention.

Posted by: Louise at August 24, 2005 04:25 PM
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My name is Y, but you can call me "Jesse's girl." I am an Aerobic Dancer and have mastered many moves, but the one I am the most proud of is "The Monkey." I have three kids. ALL FROM THE SAME DAD (Because, did you know someone actually asked me that question?) A 15 year old son, a 11 year old son and a 4 year old daughter who was not planned but who is loved more than words could ever express. I am addicted to Starbucks, reality TV and to getting really good deals through coupons and "club member" savings (Please, respect The Costco Card.) I am extremely competive and if you don't believe me, just ask my husband about the time I sold him out to win a game of Taboo. If you're waiting for the part where I speak of my love for walks on the beach or slow dancing in the rain, you're going to be disappointed because my idea of a good time usually involves things like "burping contests" and "doing The Worm".

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