It's that time again. Time where I update The World Wide Web on my weight loss journey.
Everytime I do it, I open myself up to mean, hurtful comments, I open myself up to judgements and criticism, I open myself up to embarassment and shame.
But, I also realise that I have a great deal of support from the people who read this, and that is more important to me than the negativity.
Writing about my struggle with weight, about the ups and the downs, the highs and the very VERY lows, about my shame, about my failures, about my triumphs, helps get me through this.
I recently joined weight watchers again, because, well, I wasn't making it on my own anymore. I had lost all hope that I'd ever lose The Fat. Combine that with how shitty and sick I've felt, I'd pretty much given up hope.
But, I got fed up with letting the sick, the pain and The Effin' Fat win. So, I renewed my commitment to getting healthy. I've started eating healthier and, in spite of feeling like shit, I've been dragging my ass (notice I did not PREface "ass" with "fat"?! I want you to notice that because THAT is progress, people.) to the gym every night.
First week back to WW and I'm down another 6.5 with FOURTY FIVE to go. (ok, it actually should be 55, but that's looking mighty impossible, so, 45 it is.) I'll admit I felt somewhat "weak" for going back to weight watchers again. I wanted to do this "on my own" so I could say "I did it without any help! All by myself!" But I "got a grip" because, man, we ALL need help sometimes. There's NOTHING WRONG WITH GETTING HELP. (And yes, I'm still trying to convince myself of that because I have "issues" with asking for/accepting help. Then again, I have "issues" with EVERYTHING.)







Wow! I think you look awesome! I know I don't comment too often, but I do keep up with your blog. Don't feel weak because you are going to WW. Everyone has some kind of "tool" they use to lose weight--whether it is weight loss surgery, a structured program, a trainer, or a cook. WW is the tool that you have chosen and it is a healthy choice at that. You're doing an awesome job!