I realize that posting this outs me for the pathetic loser that I am (meaning I had NO WHERE TO GO on newyears eve because ha! This is the fourth year in a row we've not been invited anywhere for New Years Eve! )
Anyway.
Oh MY GOD.
Mariah Carey. Obviously, this women has no idea that there is such a thing as TRYING TOO HARD.
MARIAH. WE GET IT. You're sexy. (but not really, but we get that you WANT us to think that.)
YOU CAN PUT YOUR BOOBS AWAY NOW.
Please. They scare me.
Also? Honey, the money you sepnd on personal assistants that help you do things like BRING THE CUP UP TO YOUR MOUTH because you're too damn lazy to do it yourself? Could you please spend that money on some dancing lessons? You're not fooling me with your oversized scarves or whatever the hell those things are you that you use to try to distract everyone from the fact that your dancing SUCKS BIG ONES.
You have big ones, don't you Mariah?
I know, I'm just jealous because OMG!11! MARIAH IZ SO HOT AND SEXXXAY!1 AND i'M NOT AND I WISH I WUZ HERZ!
But seriously.
Put your boobs away, ok?
seriously







Mariah stills scares me me...she went from Vision of love pure to Butterfly skank...the images from those videos still scare me. But dude, she lost the crack head sound and it seems that she's made amends for her Glitter debacle...
Nice, ramble on why don't I.