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September 15, 2006
The Dance of Dirty.

On Wednesday night, whilst doing the aerobic dirty dance, The Aerobic Dance Instructor gave me the ultimate compliment.

"So perfect, Y. I must take picture because it's so perfect."

I believed her when she said it and left the class swollen with pride and cockiness. I came home and told Tony "I think my instructor REALLY loves having me in her class, because I keep up with her and know all the moves."

Ummm...

After watching myself do The Dirty Dance on video, I'm PRETTY DAMN SURE that her compliment wasn't sincere and that she was secretly mocking me, knowing that compliments only encourage me to "try even harder" and "take the dance even more seriously than I already do, which TRUST ME, is VERY seriously."

P1016815.jpg

I wish I could tell you that "Haha, I just have fun with it and don't take it seriously at all." But, the faces that I make whilst spanking the air would prove that to be A LIE.

LIIIIIEEEEEEESSSSS.

(There may be a subliminal message hidden somewhere in the video and that subliminal message may very well be "Look! I wasn't lying when I said that I gained 10 pounds back, except it was actually TWELVE POUNDS, but hey, I've lost 5 of the twelve, thank you Aerobic Dancing.)

Posted by Y at September 15, 2006 11:56 AM
Comments

I think you look fabulous. We are all our own worst critics. I'm with your instructor: you are "so perfect"!

Posted by: 20%ie at September 15, 2006 12:27 PM

Y, that is awesome! I don't think your teacher was mocking you. That looked great to me! Certainly looked about 100 times better than I could have done. You are so cute!

Posted by: Tartine at September 15, 2006 12:27 PM

I don't think for a minute your instructor was mocking you. Now, that's not to say that I wouldn't be thinking the same thing. I think everyone's mocking me. You're mocking me at this very moment, I'm sure of it. But I feel certain that your instructor was not. She was being sincere. And so am I when I say you ARE the Dancing Queen.

Posted by: Itchy at September 15, 2006 12:37 PM

I want you to be my neighbor so badly. It's not fair that you aren't. Not fair, not fair, not fair!!!!

Because you are just the coolest and greatest person in the world.

Posted by: Mamacita at September 15, 2006 12:45 PM

That was priceless. The look of your face after the dance was great. It was a look of "omg i can't believe i just did that and am about to post it on the net for all of mankind to see" ha ha. I can say one thing, you've got balls. You definately won't see me posting any dance videos anytime soon. I wouldn't worry about your skills, because you've got more skills than me, that is for sure. I'm as stiff as a board when it comes to dancing.

Posted by: She at September 15, 2006 12:54 PM

I just love you to little, tiny, dirty dancing pieces!

Posted by: Oh, The Joys at September 15, 2006 12:55 PM

Now I must confess a girly crush on your bravery and total cuteness! I love the dirty dance!

Posted by: anne nahm at September 15, 2006 12:58 PM

OMG. if you were my neighbor i would TOTALLY go to Aerobic Dancing with you, and the mocking would be ALL DIRECTED at MY fat ass, because you? Oh you are PERFECT. Joo got RHYTHM, babe!

And balls. I'd never video me! hah! and giving my son some 'dance moves' for the Homecoming Dance tomorrow - he told me "...mom? don't ever dance again." harumph.

Posted by: Lessa at September 15, 2006 01:18 PM

Girl, you are hot! Stop teasing us lesbians! :-)

Posted by: keepergirl at September 15, 2006 01:23 PM

Dude, that video was 15 different kinds of awesome. You're great! And I loved the ending close-up of your boob, it made my day.

If you wanna be like me and look like an actual idiot while dancing, throw in a couple of closed-eye lip bites and hands-in-the-air "WHOOO!"s. Because that brings it to a whole nother level, believe me.

Posted by: Cheryl at September 15, 2006 01:24 PM

First...you dance really well.
Second...the faces you were making made me laugh so hard I cried!! haha

Posted by: Nina at September 15, 2006 01:25 PM

I love you guys.

Cheryl, at least you don't do the "pointing finger in the air" move.

You know, this one.

Posted by: Y at September 15, 2006 01:31 PM

Oddly enough, this is totally something I would do. However, you do it much better. I break out in outdated crazy dance moves while threatening to chaperone my kids dances. I like to scare them like that.

You, however............not scary. You move great but the fact that you videod it and looked kind of serious then broke up laughing was seriously entertaining.

I did however hope for a side view to see how you were doing that "roll" thing so maybe I could try that one out on my kids too.

Posted by: Laura at September 15, 2006 01:32 PM

funny!

Posted by: lindsay at September 15, 2006 01:36 PM

You ROCK! First because you go to aerobic dance and you love it and second because you share your aerobic dance with the world! Keep smiling - it has been an inspiration to me.

Posted by: Shannon at September 15, 2006 01:41 PM

Actually, dude, you look pretty damn H.O.T.T. I do ot lie.

Posted by: jonniker at September 15, 2006 02:27 PM

OMG Y! That was awesome! I don't think your teacher is mocking you either. I loved the look on your face at the end....how funny was that! This Cheryl doesn't do the finger in the air...I do the raised arm with a fist in the air to rock music (and get teased about it).

Posted by: Cheryl in Missouri at September 15, 2006 02:37 PM

First of all, your Alpha Mom T is amazing. Second of all, you are the cutest lady I have ever seen in my whole effing life. Cute! (and sexay!)

Posted by: Ombra at September 15, 2006 02:43 PM

You look like the real deal to me!

Posted by: Vaguely Urban at September 15, 2006 03:07 PM

You are so silly!

Posted by: Mieke at September 15, 2006 03:16 PM

Wow! I hate to repeat everyone else but you are an awesome dancer! I'm so jealous, I move like the poor little white girl that can't dance. But maybe not as dorky as Ellen from Seinfeld.

Posted by: Katie at September 15, 2006 03:28 PM

That was the best thing I have ever seen. You have joy in you, your blog has the right name. Even when you feel like shit about yourself, the joy is there, waiting to explode all over your readers ! You are the best, I love what you write and your honesty. I want you to be MY neighbor!
xoxo

Posted by: Annie at September 15, 2006 03:28 PM

You are so fucking adorable. I want to dip you in chocolate and eat you.

I mean that in the very *best* way possible.

Posted by: Type (little) a at September 15, 2006 03:43 PM

im new to your blog and i must say you have brought me so much happiness in these past few weeks with your hilarious and swet entries. anyway, on the dirty dancing-YOU ARE TOO CUTE FOR WORDS!
love the part where you were like "time out".

Posted by: lei at September 15, 2006 03:52 PM

You FUCKING rock! I so want to have your babies! Keep it up!

Posted by: BlueBird at September 15, 2006 03:57 PM

LOVE it! You are so awesome!

(Oh, and I love your house! too cute!)

Posted by: Melody at September 15, 2006 04:04 PM

Totally adorable! I think your instructor your right on the money. Love it! :-)

Posted by: Beth at September 15, 2006 04:09 PM

you TOTALLY want me!

Posted by: jennster at September 15, 2006 04:26 PM

Jennster! The air spanking gave it away, didn't it?

My hips don't lie, biznitch.

Posted by: Y at September 15, 2006 04:33 PM

Good Lord you are so freaking cute !

You are my Aerobic Dance HERO. I am totally serious!

Posted by: N at September 15, 2006 04:35 PM

Too funny. That was great. And your teacher, she no mock. If you were on So You Think You Can Dance, they'd tell you that you were "the shit!".

Posted by: Flipp-ay at September 15, 2006 04:42 PM

OMG, that is so awesome!

Posted by: jenn at September 15, 2006 04:46 PM

That was fabulous. Your blog is LOL funny--and very inspiring.

Posted by: Eliza at September 15, 2006 04:47 PM

fuck for some reason it won't play. i just get the quicktime logo.

i'm sure you're fabulous. reason why i want to come on out there and shake a groove with you. we can be fly girls--better than jblo

Posted by: girlplease at September 15, 2006 04:58 PM

omg... fuck the candles, you are so dancing for dollars!

Posted by: kristin at September 15, 2006 05:00 PM

That is so great. I am tempted to watch it repeatedly and study the moves so I can look as cool as you, cos seriously, you got tha moves!!!

Love it love it love it. Right, am seriously going to look into finding an aerobic dance class near me now!

You are so great.

Posted by: starrynite at September 15, 2006 05:10 PM

That was awesome. You move so smoothly, kinda like how I think I can move, when in reality I just look like I'm trying too hard. I think about you and your Aerobic Dance class every time I go to step aerobics, because I wish my gym was as cool as yours. :)

Posted by: Scoot at September 15, 2006 05:31 PM

You totally rocked that!! You are the reason I do not take those classes. There is no way I could like anything but a monkey on crack if I tried that. And if I stood next to you, well, I'd look even worse. You are awesome.

Posted by: RC's Girl at September 15, 2006 06:36 PM

That was AWESOME! You can really move -- I don't think your instructor was mocking you at all.

This is my first time leaving a comment on your blog, but I've been reading you for awhile, and I love you. I seriously, seriously love you.

Posted by: Cassie at September 15, 2006 07:25 PM

Y, I LOVE you! You just made my day and made me feel like one of your friends that gets to see all the funny, cute and mildly embarassing parts of you. You are the best.

Posted by: Bunny at September 15, 2006 07:36 PM

I love it! You are SO brave. And it is SO PERFECT. But I know you, and I give this post 10..mayber 12 hours land then it will just dissaaaapppear....

Posted by: danelle at September 15, 2006 08:03 PM

I'd hit it.

Posted by: Dad Gone Mad at September 15, 2006 08:08 PM

Rockin!

My gym only offers salsa and hiphop. I totally suck and both but still go just to subject myself to humiliation each time. You should TEACH aerobic dance!

Posted by: Abra Leah at September 15, 2006 08:28 PM

Gawd, I have the hugest girl crush on you.

Posted by: Kira at September 15, 2006 08:46 PM

Dude...I thought I loved you before, but until I saw that video, I did not know the meaning of blawg love.

You are SO. FLIPPING. CUTE.

And you look like you'd be so much fun to hang out with, too. Rock on with your dirty self!

Posted by: velocibadgergirl at September 15, 2006 09:08 PM

That was F- to da U- to the N-N-Y!!!

Damn girl you make me laugh so much!

Thanks :)

Posted by: pookie at September 15, 2006 11:15 PM

that wasn't actually that bad - okay, it wasn't picture perfect - but you really weren't that bad - and you made me smile - a big smile after a long week - thanks for sharing and being vulnerable and real with us all out here on the web - smiles :)
i love your blog - you on my top five list - thanks for being you!!!!

Posted by: DeeDee at September 15, 2006 11:18 PM

man, woman! (there's a saying for you) you're so harsh on yourself! I absolutely don't think your teacher was being mocking or anything. I think that was awesome, and looked so fun.

Maybe your readers shouldn't be buying you your strippa pole JUST yet, but ask yourself: did you REALLY want your readers to buy you a stripper pole?

Posted by: a Random Person at September 15, 2006 11:29 PM

HAWT!

Congratss on losing the 5 lbs.

Posted by: Maria at September 16, 2006 01:56 AM

my favorite part is when your boobs get really close to the camera. ;-)

Posted by: girl at September 16, 2006 06:06 AM

If I tried to do that, I'd probably sprain something. If they had that kind of class at my gym, I'd be like "Haha look at the stoopids dancing like they're all sexy" but I'd secretly be jealous of them, from atop my perch on the inane elliptical, because it looks like so much fun.

Please post a dancing clip at least once a week. k thx.

Posted by: laura at September 16, 2006 07:56 AM

Y, you are so cute! That was awesome!

Posted by: Creatively Evil at September 16, 2006 08:32 AM

Y- My computer sucks and it's taking a long time to load this video...I am so pissed because I am dying to see what this dirty dance is all about...LOL

Congrats on your weight loss...I think you look great!

Posted by: Brandi at September 16, 2006 08:51 AM

Damn! I couldn't get the video to work. I would love to see you dancing. Not to mock you or anything. Really.

Posted by: DebbieDoesLife at September 16, 2006 09:54 AM

Gawd, Y, you make me so hot.

Really. That was amazing. Got a cigarette?

Posted by: Carmen at September 16, 2006 10:12 AM

that video makes me want to buy an Alpha Mom T-shirt so I can be cool like you.

Posted by: Natalie from Maine at September 16, 2006 01:07 PM

hey, i'm writing from the hospital. i tried your dance moves and i am in traction. i'm typing this with a pencil in my mouth so if there are typos that's why. i'm also silly. and joking. and cute shirt. and holy maracas! did i spell that right? i thought mine were ginormous. ok well they are...mine are bigger than yours. so i win that contest but how about that wall hanging L thing. that rocks. and your living room looks great. gabby was sleeping? lol. just kidding. love ya like anotha motha. i don't really but i couldn't think of a rhyme with sister that didn't include blister. mwah!

Posted by: jenny at September 16, 2006 03:11 PM

You so rock! My fave is the spanking.... hit it, Mama!

Posted by: demondoll at September 16, 2006 04:39 PM

O.K. I finally got to see it. You are soooo hard on yourself... Your instructor was telling the truth, Ms. Dir-tay! Although I must admit, the look on your face while air spanking is priceless!!!

Posted by: Brandi at September 16, 2006 04:40 PM

You are the best!

Nobody puts Y in the corner...NOBODY!

Keep being you!

Posted by: teresa at September 16, 2006 05:41 PM

Y... Did you see that comment up there from DGM!?! He said he'd "hit it"... I would totally let him too... No, really-- I would!!
Oh- right enough about DGM.. back to you since it is your blog and all.
Girrrrlllll... you got SOME moves!! Tony must be lovin' you!! I only wish I had teh courage to move like that-- specially all over the net-- you got it goin' on girlfriend!! Love the dance- but I love the shirt more!! Where can I get one!?!

Posted by: KK at September 16, 2006 06:46 PM

You? You are completely adorable. The expressions on your face are priceless. No wonder the Pighunter loves you so.

Posted by: Julie at September 16, 2006 07:20 PM

You totally look like you are having fun and are all over that aerobic dancing! So you GO!

Posted by: denise at September 16, 2006 07:38 PM

Aerobic dancing or strip cardio? I saw a little TOO MUCH boobie touching in there.

Posted by: Sarcastic Journalist at September 16, 2006 08:41 PM

Y, you got it goin' on, girl. Seriously, I wouldn't blow smoke.

Posted by: Dani at September 17, 2006 04:55 AM

Oh dude how I love you so.

Posted by: Kathy at September 17, 2006 08:05 AM

Wow! You get tons of comments. Normally I read them all before I comment, but that will take me all day!

I think you're a wonderful dancer! So sexy! I've been doing a 50-minute aerobic dance tape that is divided in 10-minute segments of different dance types. The latin segment is nearly impossible for me to do, because I am unable to roll my pelvis. My sister says it is because I am not letting go of my inhibitions. I think I lack cooridnation. I think it takes a lot of skill to dance sexy like you.

Posted by: Lily T at September 17, 2006 08:20 AM

Your laugh and smile at the end got me. :D

Heh, and the t-shirt is righteous.

Posted by: Joe P at September 17, 2006 09:53 AM

If I send you a really cool free t-shirt with my blog name on it will you do a dirty dance video and a boob/logo closeup at the end??

Please?

Posted by: clickmom at September 17, 2006 03:09 PM

You are coordinated, brave, and awesome. I'd honored to awkwardly bump and grind with ya any day of the week.

Posted by: Mom101 at September 17, 2006 07:17 PM

WTG, Y...

I believe you'll make it one day...

I linked you up at my post about aerobic dancing.

But, did you really lie while saying that you had fun?

I don't think so! Areobic dancing is indeed fun!

Posted by: Nadine - Healthifica.com at September 17, 2006 09:35 PM

Oh my, that was hot!

Posted by: MsInterpreted at September 18, 2006 12:04 AM

That was fucking awesome and you are awesomer. Totally made my day (and that's good, cuz I was off to a lousy start, and now I'll have a little smile for the rest of the day)

Thank you. Seriously.

Posted by: ben at September 18, 2006 07:29 AM

that is by far the best video i have ever seen on the internets. get your groove on Y!

Posted by: geeky at September 18, 2006 08:41 AM

Awww you danced so good and you're so cute too hehe :)

Posted by: Mona at September 18, 2006 09:27 AM

OMGosh! Y! Looks like you have a huge fan base! I think you oughta start an online Dirty Dance CLASS!! Because I am so backwards and clumsy that I would NEVER do that in a class, much less in the privacy of Internet! But I would like to learn! ;-)

Posted by: Joy at September 18, 2006 04:51 PM

Awesome dirty dancing skills you got there girl!!

I loved the "time out" but what I loved the MOST was your so cute little giggle at the end, it cracked me up!! It just reaked of your fantasic, light hearted and youthful personality.

You rock!! I would love to take some dance classes. I have always said that I would love to learn salsa dancing........the dirty kind where you grind all over you partner.

You might give me the inspiration to bite the bullet and sign up for some classes.

Thanks for the great video.

Posted by: Dawn at September 18, 2006 07:07 PM

you are so hot!

And, you did the dirty dance in an Alpha Mom T-shirt. Oh, how i love you!

Posted by: isabel at September 19, 2006 01:22 PM

that's so hot! you're so hot!

And, you wore your Alpha Mom T-shirt. I love u.

Posted by: isabel at September 19, 2006 01:39 PM

You are awesome.
And I love your beautiful smile.

Posted by: Rachael at September 20, 2006 10:58 PM

You are great. Seriously. I've had 10 years of professional dance training and I could never bring myself to show off "my moves" to people who weren't in my classes with me. Keep it up!

Posted by: Caitlin at September 22, 2006 07:04 AM
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    About Y
    My name is Y, but you can call me "Jesse's girl." I am an Aerobic Dancer and have mastered many moves, but the one I am the most proud of is "The Monkey." I have three kids. ALL FROM THE SAME DAD (Because, did you know someone actually asked me that question?) A 15 year old son, a 11 year old son and a 4 year old daughter who was not planned but who is loved more than words could ever express. I am addicted to Starbucks, reality TV and to getting really good deals through coupons and "club member" savings (Please, respect The Costco Card.) I am extremely competive and if you don't believe me, just ask my husband about the time I sold him out to win a game of Taboo. If you're waiting for the part where I speak of my love for walks on the beach or slow dancing in the rain, you're going to be disappointed because my idea of a good time usually involves things like "burping contests" and "doing The Worm".

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