I was thinking of renaming this blog to www.the-car-accident-blog.com. But, I think it would be easier and less annoying if I just stopped talking about the freaking accident.
HOWEVER.
There were two very Exciting! Updates! that I must write about. And then, I will never speak of it again, for it will be dead to me and alive to God, because I am giving The Accident to God.
Exciting! Update! #1. We got our deductible back.
Exciting! Update! #2. It is now an uninsured motorist claim. The other driver (who was at fault, and who I will now refer to as The Perp, as in The Perpetrator.) is no where to be found and someone who lives at her house told our adjuster that she is "out of town" until "sometime late July."
How precious. She causes a major accident, avoids the law and flees town. I really hope God blesses her life in a beautiful way. (Pray for your enemies! Treat them with kindness! Do not be bitter! Blessings and love to all, even uninsured assholes!)
Moving on.
I recently made the decision to switch up my workout schedule. Rather than going to the gym in the evenings, I decided that I'd start hitting that bitch early in the A.M. So, yesterday morning I arose at 5:30 and made my way to the All Wimmins Gym.
Whoa.
I was NOT prepared for Early Rising Worker Outters.
I’m used to going to the gym after 7pm. The people who are at the gym when I get there are tired, quiet and somewhat grumpy. They don’t want to talk about their day and they don’t care about how you’re doing or what your plans are for the weekend. They just want to do their curls and squats and get the hell out of there.
But the Morning Worker Outters are a completely different kind of people.
They are happy! And perky! And glad to be alive! And coated in a thick, vanilla scent! And generally annoying!
They’re all “Good morning!” “How are you?” “Ready to burn some of that oh so abundant fat?” “Jesus loves you and so does the treadmill!”
There were a couple of women on the treadmill going on and on about how great they felt and how happy they were to be there on the treadmill burning the calories and how they were planning a bridal shower for their best friend and how fucking HAPPY they were to be doing it.
Here I was, ready to roundhouse kick any vanilla scented vagina that came within 10 feet of my personal space and these women were like “omygod, I’m so glad you’re here… GROUP HUG AND THEN HOWZA’BOUT WE DO SOME CRUNCHES, GOD’S CHILDREN!”
I wasn’t prepared for such love and friendliness so damn early in the morning.
I was genuinely in awe of these women who purposely get up early to go to the gym and are so gosh darn happy and excited to be there.
Fah-reaks.
I plan on becoming an Early Worker Outter, because I absolutely loved not having “I have to go to the gym” hanging over my head all day long, but I can promise you that I will never be one of those vanilla scented freaks who sports a smile on my face and radiates Gods Love from my overweight soul while doing bicep curls before 7 in the morning.
I give you major credit for going to the gym that f'ing early. I can barely get my ass out of bed in the mornings. I don't understand perky morning people. And I married one!