How sad (or funny?) is it that the first thing I thought when I saw this collection of dvd's in one of the boxes in the garage today that the FIRST THING I thought was this...
"Losers cry/buy workout dvd's that they're never going to use. $19.99 x 8= like $160.00 x however many other dvds you bought in hopes of losing that lard ass= a pretty sweet down payment on a house."
You know what that means right?
That I AM A WINNER.
Oh, yes. that Leslie's annoying factor is OFF THE CHARTS. She needs a fist to the neck for sure.
You know what's sad? I bought every one of those dvd's out of desperation. Every single one of them was going to be "The One" that changed my life and made me thin.
Haaaa
At least your workouts are from this decade - the most recent workout video I have is Richard Simmons' "Dancin' to the Oldies" on VHS. :D
Did you order the ones from the infomercial? With the "Deal a Meal" and the "resistance bands"?
Because I totally bought that one.
Here is what my plan for the evening would be if life were different and there were no consequences and things were not as they are in reality:
Get high. Watch Zoolander and Grease. Eat Little Debbie Swiss Cake Rolls. Set fire to Walk away the Pounds DVDs.
Unfortunately, I don't smoke weed anymore, I don't have any Little Debbie snack cakes and I think that setting fire to my WATP DVDs would not help me lose the weight. But God, a girl can dream.
I'm adding "watch Zoolander while Not Low" to my list of things I must do before I die.
I giggle enough at Zoolander without any enhancements :P Now, can I come to your Fat Burning DANCE Partay? And will you do the worm? ;)
Dude.
"fat burning" is going to be the theme of my next birthday par-tay and you're totally invited.
Hand towels and 3 lb hand weights required. I'm giving you plenty of notice.
cheer up..better a how to lose weight dvds on your collection than porn :D
Sorry Dito,
I think if everyone practiced the moves on a porn video we'd all be thin! All that exercise and LOW calorie snacks :-) Oprah had a lady on her show a few months ago promoting her book about the sex diet. You lose weight since sex is exercise and since you are constantly nekkid in front of your partner you naturally want to look better so you are more careful in what you eat.... hmmm. Whatcha think?
Damnit, I thought it was the bean dip and the Starbucks that f'ed it all up... the DVDs, too!? Garrrhhh.
*shoots you a 'blue steel'*
Screw em. Sammy taught me that you need to enjoy right now. Do you have a roof over your head? Fantastic! Can you make the bills without losing too much sleep? Wonderful. Now go enjoy the rest. Saving is a good idea, but saving every stupid little penny while you sit around and feel awful about the fact that you can't do anything? Why do that? Having a house is great, but so is enjoying your children (and YOUR life) while you can, because you just never know. I'd hate to think that we didn't enjoy a dinner out once in a while, but man - the money we have in savings!
(Which is like, nill, because our health insurance system is so f*cked up, but that's another post.)
There. I have the final word and anyone else can take it up with me. Because seriously, who's going to argue with the mama of a heart kid about the importance of enjoying the now? ;-)
Don't we ALL have a collection of DVD's like that? Never mind, I'm going to assume yes and move on. I agree with others. I have a house, am BROKE because of it now, so I say RENT and enjoy life!!!! There's nothing wrong with it! I actually have friends that bought houses, didn't like it, sold, and now happily rent and plan to do so forever! Anyway, I think you're fantastic just the way you are - thought you should know!
I"m pretty sure you are missing Yoga Booty Ballet. I'm pretty sure I have it. I'm also pretty sure it's been sitting in the box it came in for months and months....
Where is The Grind?
omg. SARA! (miss you.)
DON'T WORRY! It is packed away safely in a box that has yet to be unpacked.
That really is the greatest workout dvd ever made--and I wouldn't have known that were it not for YOU.
My husband is adamant about keeping our DVDs out of sight; he doesn't want people to come over and judge us on what DVDs we own (probably because he goes over to other people's houses and judges them on what DVDs they own).
I don't see Carmen Electra's stripping dvd's in there? I always thought that would be the way to go, learn how to strip tease and lose weight at the same time! Added bonus, Husband very happy to have a stripper wife. We all win! lol
HAve you ever bought one of those DVDs and then sat down with a snack and amilkshake, to watch it through, you know so you know what is going to be expected of you, next time, when you actually DO it? Not that I have done that and then not ever actually got around to putting it back in the DVD player because, well it wasn't much of a watch really and I don't want to do it.
Sadly, my collection includes both VHS and DVD. A reminder of the waste of money AND how long I've been fat.
heeheeheehee.
ditto.
Better those than "Never Been Kissed" (swear on Bossy's hump that was the first DVD on the shelf that caught her eye.)
HA ha haha - Dito - porn might be better for the marriage than the exercise DVDs : )
(my exercise vids are so old, they are VHS ...at least they are not Beta!!! Old I am.)
Hey Y, how abouta "exercise dvd swap" instead of the classic guys 'porn swap.'???
Sadly, the only movies out of that bunch that I've seen are Zoolander and Grease.
Your math reminds me of my gym math. I've been paying for a gym for 2 years that I've never gone to. I figured out one day that I could've been making payments on lipo all this time and just been done with it!
DID YOU ADD IN TAX?
If not, you are not a winner.
Our accumulations differ in that mine are VHS tapes. So, they're older and thus, haven't been used for loooonger.
Meh. We're both sad :)
Y, I tell my family that my name is Sheila, and I'm addicted to fitness videos.=) I have so many, and some haven't even been opened! I keep thinking that I've found the magic one. I can't help myself!
Put them on Amazon and sell those babies. Do that math! Even if you get 2 or 3 bucks each its better than having them just collect dust. Put the money in your down payment ING account and earn fat interest. There is some math for ya.
Hmmmm looking at my collection I would be considered a Lovesap'd Alien Who Kicks Butt with the Best of Friends....yes...too many love stories, Alien Collector and added doses. of women who kick butt with their best friends.
That's why you're my girl, never afraid to try something new, even math :) LOL
I don't even want to speculate what my DVD (or especially my VHS) collection says about me. I can guarantee it isn't flattering though but screams 80's really really loudly.
I was just told today that my cholesterol was elevated. Maybe my DVD collection should look more like yours.
Ohhhh, you're TOO funny.....and waaaay too hard on yourself! Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, in America, has butt-loads of stuff that they bought that they either didn't need or don't use! What does it say about me if I have a whole bookcase full of Disney movie tapes/DVDs???!! Now, what if I added that I was childless??!! (Just kidding, I've got one kid!)....but, I bought that copy of The Little Mermaid long before he was born! Hope the new house/furniture/kitchen is proving to be enjoyable!!
I have been lurking your site and I must leave a message and let you know that I love reading your blog. You are a great writer and you give me tons of laughs. Thank you
I know you have been struggling with the weight. I was wondering if you have tried the Smash Diet by Dr. Ian from Celebrity Fit Club? Sounds cheesy but I have tried it and i worked for me.
I wish I still had Zoolander. We lent it to some random guy we only tangentially know, and he had the gall to tell us he thought it was "pedantic" and then MOVE OUT OF THE COUNTRY.
WITH OUR ZOOLANDER DVD.
Asshat.
ZOOLANDER! I love it... there is something about that character... heh!
ZOOLANDER! I love it... there is something about that character... heh!
But if you bundle them up you can use them as weights.... for your tablecloth outside so the wind doesn't pick up and spill your wine......
i'll want to get that Pilate complete for weight loss!
heehee....
we got all kinds of dvds hidin in a box too! thats why recently we decided to subscribe to HBO and Cinemax to save some $$$ in dvds
We have to, at times, spend money that isn't specific towards bills and food. Or we'd GO CRAZY. These super-saver, had a 4 story mansion at 25 have gone to the movies or bought Spiderman on DVD...several times over. Don't let them make you feel guilty. I'm pretty sure that your children or husband get what they WANT before you get something you need let alone want.
I love walk away the pounds, even though some of the girls make me want to roundhouse kick them.