Joy Unexpected | Winners do the Math!

October 23, 2009

Hair- A Love Story

I love to braid hair.

I can't tell you how many other peoples children whose hair I've braided for dance recitals or school photos.

"You need to have a girl of your own!" The moms would say.

When I thought that I was finished having children after my sons were born, I would wonder what it would be like to have a daughter, if only to braid her beautiful, long hair.

As The Rhythm Method would have it, I found myself unexpectedly pregnant 7 years after having what I deemed "My Last Child!"

A girl.

A daughter.

And as nervous as I was about mothering a daughter (due to the complicated relationship I have with my own mother) I was THRILLED that I would be able to braid hair EVERY SINGLE DAY if I wanted to.

Of COURSE, MY daughter didn't like for me to braid her hair.

"I WANT TO WEAR IT STRAIGHT DOWN!" she has said in dramatic fashion on more than one hair brushing session.

I thought about cutting her hair into a cute little bob because what's the fun of having a daughter with long hair if I can't braid it? My husband had to talk me out of chopping it all off on more than one occasion.

Eventually, she grew out of the "NO BRAIDS!" phase. Almost every morning, I put her hair into a braid of some kind. Sometimes a fancy braid. Sometimes a regular ol' french braid.

It's time consuming, for sure. Even if she wears it down, it takes what feels like FOREVER to blow dry. And every night I have to put it in a braid so it doesn't wrap around her neck or get tangled while she sleeps.

Not to mention the fights we've had over her hair. Remember The Great Bangs Drama of 2008? OH DEAR GOD IN HEAVEN, I DO.

I've thought about cutting it. She would look adorable with a bob!

But here's the thing.

I have become attached to her long hair. It's beautiful, with it's soft, shiny, golden, highlights. I love the way that it smells after I dry it in the evenings. I love running my fingers through it when she's reading her kindergarten books to me at night. I love watching her "style it" when she's playing dress up.

I know the day will come when she'll tell me she wants short hair. And I will agree and we'll cut it off. Because "It's only hair!" right? But I've come to realize why it means so much to me. That long, beautiful hair of hers reminds me every day of something that I never thought I'd have in my life.

A daughter.

Posted by Y at October 23, 2009 11:46 AM

Comments

Wow! She is growing up so quickly. Beautiful hair. Beautiful child.

Posted by: carma at October 23, 2009 1:05 PM

I love this! I am the surprised mom of a daughter - always imagining myself with a boy and imagining how awkward I might be with a girl and oh, she's just lovely.

Posted by: pom. at October 23, 2009 1:07 PM

Oh you do beautiful braids! I just got really nostalgic for my childhood when my mom would fix my hair every morning. Sighhhh

Posted by: carissajaded at October 23, 2009 1:49 PM

Now I have to have another kid. DAMN YOU.

Posted by: Kathy at October 23, 2009 2:20 PM

Honestly, she just has the BEST expressions.

Posted by: Donna at October 23, 2009 2:55 PM

She is SO beautiful!

Posted by: ClassyFabSarah at October 23, 2009 2:58 PM

Every day--every SINGLE day--I wake up and I am so thankful that I was graced with a daughter. ME! I have a DAUGHTER. It makes me misty just to think about it.

Posted by: Aunt Becky at October 23, 2009 3:01 PM

How in the world do you do that braid in the photo? I have seen lots of french braids in my time, but never like THAT! It looks awesome. You must point me to an instructional website or something. :)

Posted by: holly at October 23, 2009 4:39 PM

That was a beautiful story, beautiful braid, and of course beautiful little girl.

I have son and if I get pregnant again, I'm nervous of it being a girl, but this post makes a mother daughter bond seem so very special.

And I'd like that.

Posted by: Amira @ DefineMature.com at October 23, 2009 4:49 PM

She is simply beautiful! Lucky mom, lucky daughter!

Posted by: Kim at October 23, 2009 5:10 PM

Like Holly, I want to know how you did that braid! I can French braid, but not like that. It's beautiful! And I'm like you... two boys, not supposed to have anymore. We tried for 3-1/2 years, only giving up when testing showed that we weren't supposed to be able to get pregnant without using IVF. 4 months later, I was pregnant... due on my deceased mom's birthday... with the girl my mom always wanted me to have. A sign from above. And like your girl, she's beautiful, sweet, loving, independent. We did cut her hair short a couple of years ago at her request, but immediately she wanted to grow it back out, and now it's midway down her back. I love to style it. :)

Posted by: Debbie at October 23, 2009 8:21 PM

Can you come live in my house please? I promise - if you'll braid it, it will take me less than a year to grow it back down to my butt. And? I do the math.

Posted by: TJ at October 23, 2009 8:40 PM

I go through the same hair battles with my daughter, she hates even having her hair brushed! When the time comes for 'the haircut' you could donate your girls beautiful hair to locks of love, it might make it easier? We are trying to have the patience to grow it long enough so my daughter can donate, I think they want 10 inches.

Posted by: Timothea at October 23, 2009 8:44 PM

I grew up the only girl with four brothers. I yearned for a girl. Had two sons, and husband thought we were finished. AHEM. My daughter is 12 now, and I adore her. I never stop being grateful for her, even when she is acting like a 12 year old. I wish I could braid as well as you can. Fortunately, my sister in law can, so my daughter gets to feel girly on occasion.

Posted by: Mary at October 23, 2009 9:24 PM

When I was pregnant with my son (thankthelord) I used to pray, "Please give me a boy - I don't know how to braid hair!" So happy you have been blessed to braid lady.

Posted by: Debi at October 23, 2009 10:06 PM

Wow - that braid is gorgeous. Will you come over and braid my hair too!

Posted by: 12ontheinside at October 24, 2009 12:20 AM

Awww, cute! In that 2nd pic, she looks just like her older brothers! :) It's adorable that they have some of the same facial expressions!

Posted by: Starr at October 24, 2009 7:22 AM

she may not ever ask to cut it short... the fist time I went short I was 25!

Posted by: Jessica at October 24, 2009 8:51 AM

You're daughter is beautiful...and your braids...oh my!

My daughter is 12. She was born when our boys were 6 and 8. Not a day passes that I don't still pinch myself with disbelief that I have a daughter!

(Her hair is short...I don't braid...and it's still magical!)

Posted by: Beverly at October 24, 2009 9:01 AM

Oh (sniffle) that is so sweet! I too have two daughters, now grown up, and I ATTEMPTED to French braid their hair, but I could never get it to look as good as Gabby's does. Somehow there were always little strands that escaped the braiding, and what was I supposed to do with them? I didn't know, so sometimes I gelled them down!

Posted by: marjorie at October 24, 2009 11:34 AM

Love the pics.... such a beautiful girl! Such beautiful hair, too!

Wonderful post... made me smile and recall my own mom braiding my hair when I was young. =)

Posted by: Beth at October 24, 2009 1:37 PM

I wish I had your braiding talent...or patience. It no longer matters since my daughter is fifteen and quite capable of doing her own hair in any number of wild styles. Enjoy these moments as I know you do!

Posted by: Nicki at October 25, 2009 6:07 AM

Sniff Sniff. Gosh she's growing up quick.

Posted by: lynne at October 25, 2009 11:00 AM

My god she is so gorgeous. Her hair makes me jealous. But her adorable face makes me smile:)

Posted by: Jen @ lifelove'n'wine at October 26, 2009 6:25 AM

If you do decide to cut it, you can donate it to "locks of love" They make wigs and hair pieces for children with a rare disorder and cannot grow their own hair. They have a web site with all the information about donating. My 17 yr. old daughter just donated 10 inches. She was so used to having really long hair for so long, but she looks great with her new hair cut.

Posted by: Ruthie at October 26, 2009 6:34 AM

She has beautiful hair!

Posted by: Jeanette at October 26, 2009 8:32 AM

What a sweet post! Growing up, I LOVED to play with my dolls' hair and joked many times that I only wanted daughters so I could play with their hair. I am the proud mother of two daughters, and both of them HATE having their hair done. They will barely tolerate a bobby pin, and forget braids. Curls? No way. *sigh*

Posted by: Lar at October 26, 2009 11:30 AM

I love posts from Mommy's who speak of grattitude for the priviledge of having a child. They are refreshing beyond belief. She's lovely....long hair or no hair. She's just lovely.

Posted by: Kristy at October 26, 2009 12:48 PM

eeewwwwwww, rat's tails! go with the bob it would look good on her

Posted by: billie B at October 26, 2009 4:17 PM

Those last pics? OMG. Beautiful. They need to be on your wall. With those crooked pictures I'm supposed to come help you with. HAHAHAHA

Posted by: Lena at October 27, 2009 6:27 PM

Beautiful. Just beautiful.

I guess my bonding hair moment with my girls will be to teach them how to maintain their afros!

Posted by: maya at October 28, 2009 6:29 AM

Awwww! You do some fancy braid work.

Posted by: Kyla at October 29, 2009 6:10 AM

Wow, she is really getting grown up, isn't she!! What a lovely girl.

Posted by: dorrie at October 30, 2009 7:45 AM

Girl! I love to braid hair, and go figure have all boys. My girlfriends bring their daughters to my house before soccer games on Saturdays so I can french braid pigtails for them. I feel you on loving to braid! :)

Posted by: Jessie at November 4, 2009 6:49 AM

Beautiful girl! BTW, YOU can grow your own hair, you know. I started at 42, my hair is beautiful and my DH is insane about it. One disagreement: I don't trust Locks of Love.

Posted by: Roni at January 21, 2010 1:55 PM