The bubbly affects the typie

THe great thing about not being able to sleep at night for fear of dying because your heart races and you feel like you can’t catch your breath is that you can totally drink a glass of wine to “relax” and not get judged because who would judge someone who can’t sleep atnight if she wants a glass or 3 of wine?
Yeah, thats’ what I thought.
The thing about nothaving drunketh of the wine in a long time is tahat one forgets how much one can have witouth “overdoing” it. You know what I’ms aying?
I think you do.
I don’t understnad why more people don’t be inviting me out do things with. Serioulsy. I am a Party On Two Legs, people. Let’s take today for as an example, shallw e?
At lunch with my sister and our children, I thought I’d “scoot over” so Ethan could have a seat. I had Gabby in my arms and I thought “I have plenty of room, I’ll just scoot on over” but I was so wrong because I actually was sitting at the end of the booth and had absolutely no room and my non chalant litlte scoot turned into me plopping straight on my ass WHILST HOLDING MY DAUGHTER IN FRONT OFTHE ENTIRE RESTAURANT. Let me draw you a picture since I haven’t done that in a while. (but let me stop laughing first because MAN, was that funny!)

You get the idea, I think. How could you not with that perfect illustration?
And to think that there are people who DON’T wnat to be my friend or at least not admit to it by taking me out in public.
I was going through my photo colletion tonight beacuse what else is one going to do when they’re afraid they’ll die in their sleep because their heart races besides drink a glass or so of wine and look at pictures/?
Man, I really do have th e greatest photo collection.
Especially in the “self portrait” category.

Ok. DId my hair REALLY just “happen” to fallin front of my face, covering one eye, or was I, maybe, PERHAPS, trying to look sexy in my husbands striped shirt?
I think I’m going to put together a set on flickr called “trying to be sexy or just acting completely natural and totally not trying to be sexy at all?”
This would be my second entry in that post.
Trying to be sexy or just taking a picture of “my hat” and totally leaning over because I wanted you to see the hat, not becausei was trying to show a little cleavage and IT’S NOT MYFAULT IF I LOOK SO CUTE BENT OVER!?”
you decide.
Oh man, this could be so much fun. No wonder people make fun of me all the time! It’s fun and easyto do! ha!
But seriously folks, no more wine for me.
Thank you and goodnight.

23 thoughts on “The bubbly affects the typie

  1. kim

    i really hope you got some sleep. not that you’re not funny with lack of sleep and the wine, but i don’t think that’s good for you in a long term. ;o) you won’t die, Y. not in your sleep or falling off benches. at 94 you’ll have a website called or something like that and be the funny Y we all love. so try and get some sleep. hope you’re doing that right now

  2. Mellissa

    The last time I drank, I was at a wedding and had a glass of white wine and half a glass of champagne. Then I was so giddy I thought I was having a panic attack, which brought on a panic attack, and my husband had to take me outside. It wasn’t funny at the time, but it is now!
    No more wine for me any time soon…..

  3. oxie

    Oh and question…why weren’t you wearing a shirt? And no shoes? I am surprised you even got any service. The skirt looks very stylish though.

  4. Karen

    You are a kick!!! ROFL!!!! The main thing is, you can laugh at yourself, and that is something I’ve become really good at.
    Have a good day!!

  5. NinaKaye

    Perhaps I should partake of the wine…or something else since I don’t like wine. That might help me out a little bit.

  6. gc

    You crack me up. And, btw, I would hang with you. Why don’t we have your people call my people?…Wait, I don’t have “people”. Well, you have my email, anyways. 🙂

  7. Annika

    Oh, man. I do stuff like that ALL THE TIME. The falling over. The “accidentally” sexy self-portraits. The self-medicating. All of it.

  8. Rachel in AK

    Very funny post. Very. Funny. Laughed my butt off, at work, in my cube! I totally have a zillion “trying to be sexy” poses.

  9. Jen

    I just love sexy self-portraits. I have a small box full and whenever I feel like laughing my ass off, I look at them. My favorite is one where I am sitting, trying to do the sexy pose. I look like I sucked on a lemon and my legs are broken. Too funny. Hope you got some sleep!

  10. Les~

    Y: Regarding your heart palpitations, have you ever had your Potassium level checked? I have empathy for you in this regard as I ended up in an E.R. on vacation once when for 3 of the 4 nights we were gone, I couldn’t sleep due to a racing heart. On the way to the airport, I thought I was dying, so we called 911 in the limo and EMS met us at the airport for transport to the E.R. It is indeed scary and also exhausting. So, if you haven’t had your Potassium checked, it might be something to check in to. Also, eating bananas, cantaloupe and potatos which are high in Potassium helps a lot. I did a search on high potassium foods online and lots more to pick from in case you can’t eat or don’t like the three I suggested. Anyway, good luck with it and I hope you get some sleep soon!

  11. Kristina

    I have to side with Les~ on this. Potassium. Although if you eat too many carbs and are also pre-diabetic that will happen too, but my sisters turned out to be a simple case of potassium levels. So get yourself checked to be on the safe side. It could also be due to your thyroid. Get yourself to a doctor for a routine checkup and explain whats going on.

  12. debutaunt

    Baby you so sexy, you make me want to hump your leg. But I don’t mean that in such a gayballs way.
    You’re cute as hell. Fcuk the haters!

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