There will never be another like me.

I know there will always be someone prettier than me, smarter than me, funnier than me…
But there will never, ever…


be anyone who freaks out because her device that unlocks the door on her van (you know, the alarm thingy on your key chain, the one you press to unlock the doors?) won’t work and panics and starts crying because she “can’t unlock her doors so therefore she can’t go anywhere all day on her day off and cries, whyyyyyyyyyy, why does shit like this always happen to me?” only to have her FIVE YEAR OLD say…. “uh, mommy, why don’t you just unlock it with the KEY.”

I am not very smart.

11 thoughts on “There will never be another like me.

  1. Mike

    Ain’t technology grand? I was in a similar spot when I lost the remote to my TV and was bitching about how I couldn’t watch the last episode of my favorite show. So then my younger cousin comes to visit, goes over to my TV, and turns it on with the buttons actually on the TV. I just stared in awe, as if to say “Oh, that’s what they’re for! I thought they were decoration!”
    Since then I’ve added this axiom to my daily unspoken mantra: No matter how smart you think you are, there will always be someone a fraction of your age and capability who can make you feel incredibly thick-headed.

  2. Mister Mittens

    Hmm, a van� like a minivan or one of those all decked out full size rides with mood lighting and shag carpet (AKA: The LoveVan) Oh, sorry I got all carried away.
    [Mister Mittens � One mobile pussy]

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