My vagina is freaking OUT, but in a good way.

Tonight. Finally.
It’s just “The Class” so we still have to wait for the actual procedure, but at least we’re on the way to fear free sex.
I assumed I’d be coming to the class with him, but when I brought it up, Tony was all “hell to the NO.”
I suppose he thinks I won’t take the class seriously. He thinks I’ll
not be very mature. What does he think I’ll do?
Laugh at inappriate times?
Draw pictures of weiners getting sliced up?
Ask lots of questions about how big the balls actually get?
Oh, how much fun it would have been, but I’ll never know because I’ve been “forbidden.”
Tony 403’d my ass.
Honestly? I don’t blame him. It’s better I stay home and laugh about my husbands balls then do it in front of a bunch of men and one doctor who won’t find me very funny anyway.
I’m excited it’s finally happening and not just because I’m H to the O to the r-n-y, either.
Ok, yeah. That’s the ONLY reason I’m excited about it. I’m sick of saying “No!” Or “Get that thing off of me!” OR “I WILL KILL YOU IF I GET PREGNANT”.
I am so ready to get a good Enchilada Stuffing and actually enjoy it.
It’s been over a year. It’s time to get that Weapon “deactivated” and back in business.
If you know what I’m sayin’ and I think you do.
I just “reviewed” the materials the they handed out in “class”. Tony was completely right in “forbidding me” from attending with him.


There’s more. Oh man, is there more, but you get the idea. No way would I have made it through that class without laughing hysterically.
Because? I’m twelve.

14 thoughts on “My vagina is freaking OUT, but in a good way.

  1. jenn

    I went with my husband…and his doc didnt like my roasted nuts comment either….but I laughed! Hey you have to make light about situations like that!!

  2. JennyJenJen

    “Hell to the No” is my new favorite saying! I don’t care what anyone says, that is Whitney Houston’s show.

  3. empie

    Ok this is just wierd and I swear it was not planned this way, but why are both of our husbands at the SNIP SNIP class at the same time, as a matter of fact my hubby is there as we speak. OK that’s tooooo wierd!
    My mom told me to have the ice ready after he has it done, I can’t wait, my husband 86’d me too, said I would
    make jokes about it in the class, so I stayed home too!

  4. Gina

    It’s so strange hearing that there is a class out there, for this.
    My husband had it done last year and it was no more than a visit to our family Dr., then the appt. to get snipped, which went fairly quickly.
    He was on the couch for a weekend and a bag of frozen peas became his closest friend.
    So don’t forget the peas.

  5. christina

    I love those pictures. “After You’re Sterile” – heeee!
    We never got to go to a class. Darn.
    My husband had “the procedure” done two years ago and it was no problem at all. Everything healed up nicely.

  6. Girl

    Oh my gods! That picture of the couple just caused me to have a flashback of the book my mom gave me on “how babies are made.”
    Thanks, Y 🙂

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