When the Trading Spaces crew arrived, I was excited! Thrilled! Oh! The updates! The photos! The stories I’d have to tell!
But then…
The teenager got sick.
I got slammed with work.
I found out the designer was NOT Doug.
Aaaand I suddenly lost interest. I tried to care. I tried to be excited about it and to take pictures and to report back to The Internet, but I just got bored with it. If you’re not actually involved with the show, it’s totally boring. Also? A little annoying and disruptive to your life.
Example. I was getting ready to pick the boys up from school. I was on my way to the car carrying G’s car seat thinking that G was right behind me. She wasn’t. I turned around and saw the garage door to the house was still open. “Gabs!” I yelled “Hurry up! We have to go!” All of a sudden, I felt like the entire world was watching me. I turned to my right and ha ha ha! About 30 people, including Hot Carpenter, Paige Davis, Some Blonde Chick Designer and a Camera Dude were all staring (glaring) at me. It was like “CUT! Big Mouth woman next door just ruined the scene. Let’s take it from the top AS SOON AS SHE SHUTS HER BIG FAT MOUTH.” Of course, they didn’t actually say that, with their words. But the looks on their faces said it, man.
There were a couple of things worth mentioning.
Thing 1: The carpenter dressed up like an elf. Except, only from the waist up. There weren’t any tights involved. (Total rip off!) Anyway. Gabs wasn’t convinced he was trying to be an elf and every time we’d see him she’d be all “Mom, why does that man thinks he’s Peter Pan?”
OH SNAPS.
Thing 2: The carpenter has a LOT of help. I am probably the only one who thought he really did all of the projects by himself, but alas… No. He had 3 or 4 guys at any given time doing work for him. I was genuinely shocked by this revelation. PigHunter was not. “Did you really think that one carpenter did all of that work? I knew all along he had help. He just gets all the credit for it while looking pretty for the camera.”
And that’s all I’ve got.
I know. I’m lame.
I can see how that would be annoying. Do they really expect the world to stop for them to film? the show’s not even that cool anymore! Boo to no Doug… but I still hope your snooty neighbor got Hildy or someone similarly traumatizing!
Lame? No, a new post from you is more like a peek of sunlight through a fog bank. Yay!
And Trading Spaces is, like, totally dead to me now.
They are overpaid pretty people anyway. Look at it this way, you were noticed by a bunch of tv people! 😉
Dude, why DOES the carpenter think he’s Peter Pan? I think those TS people got that outfit all wrong.
HAHAHAHAHA! I would have totally made the most of distracting the camera crew… What are they going to do? You’re on your own driveway! I would have had a spontaneous garage sale! With a clown! And pony rides! Up and down the street!
Also, I’m with Elizabeth… Elves shouldn’t wear peter pan outfits unless they WANT to be confused with peter pan! Santa’s rolling his eyes somewhere, I just know it….
Hope your son’s feeling better : )
Well, you and I are clueless together because I certainly thought the carpenter did all of the work because THAT’S HOW THEY PORTRAY IT!
And you are not a disappointment at all, not to us and not to Trading Spaces, so you yelled in YOUR yard, you have the right.
Don’t be so hard on yourself. You are worth more than you ever know. I wish you believed this.
And the hot elf carpenter should have worn really tight tights or nothing at all. That would have been AWESOME.
and dangerous.
I’m giggling because the candycane appears to be hanging off his pocket or something.
Mama, why is that man so delusional?
He is so obviously a poseur.
If he was the REAL peter pan he’d be at disneyland where he belongs. duh.
THAT is priceless.
the elf shirt is totally lame without the tights.
i’m all “HEY CHECK OUT MY MARIE ANTOINETTE COSTUME! OH YOU COULDN’T TELL BECAUSE I STILL HAVE MY HEAD ON? OH, WELL, IT WAS IMPLIED.”
“Mom, why does that man think he’s Peter Pan?” = awesome. Also, is he making wooden candycanes? Because it kind of looks like it.
That would have been the perfect opportunity for a garage sale. A garage sale to end all garage sales, with balloons and music and flyers stapled to every telephone pole in a 10 mile radius, so there’s constantly tons of people around to annoy the crew. DAMN why didn’t I think of this sooner?
I TOTALLY thought the carpenter did ALL the work. Ripoff. Good thin Ty isn’t still their carpenter; I’d have superglued myself to your roof.
By thin, I naturally meant THING. Of course. I’m literate, yo.
Are the kids already writing their Santa letters? (Mine do year-round, so having an elf next door wouldn’t make a difference. Maybe your kids are normal, though.)
Maybe it’s just me and my perverted mind, but just lost my shit laughing over the strategically located candy cane looking thing.
You are so completely more interesting than any of these silly people…
Well, that does it. Thanks to the suit, I no longer envy tv stars. You know he’s going back to his hotel every night thinking, “crap, I’ve gotta wear that Peter Pan suit again tomorrow. and it’s freakin summer.” And I have to concur with Amaelija, you took the photo just right. :O)
A pox on Trading Spaces! And your daughter nailed it — he make look all cute, but he’s just begging for attention. (I totally thought they worked all through the night or whatever to get their own projects done — didn’t have a clue they had help. 🙂
Your daughter is so right! That is certainly a Peter Pan costume. You would think the wardrobe people would know that elves do not wear hats with feathers in them. Havent they seen the movie Elf? Good call on her part!
I’m lame with you. I thought it was just him too. I guess I never really thought about it!
Leeann
niccofive.blogspot.com
Haha! I totally thought the carpenter worked alone!!!
I admit it, I too thought he did all the work. I was in awe (it takes me months to get my husband to change a light bulb). I’m glad you let the rest of uninformed people in on the secret!
Wait, what? The carpenter has assistants? Dang! I do some building around the house, and it takes me for-freakin-ever, and I actually watched that show and thought that somehow, magically, if you had real training and good tools you could just throw up a full entertainment center in a week. Gah. I guess it makes me feel better about myself, but there go my dreams of someday having those mad skillz.
And congratulations on your personal developments regarding your weight. It is truly awesome to see you at peace with your body.
I thought the carpenter worked alone, too. I just figured he was a REALLY good carpenter. haha
I thought the carpenter did all the work too. I’d be bummed if I built something and the pretty boy got all the credit.
Uhm, that carpenter IS peter pan. That is CLEARLY not an elf hat. That is all.
Get your husband to blog it, I would love to hear Pighunter’s evaluation of all this. And you RUINED their TAKE how COULD YOU???
I would be letting my cats out to “go” in their yard, if they were next door to me. I’m so nice 🙂
I thought the carpenter worked alone too. I totally have to agree with Gabby, he looks like peter pan. I think they bought that costume at the Disneystore. Speaking of Disney, I’m trying to get a hold of my sister.
Dude. I always thought the carpenter worked alone too! But that makes sense, one person can’t do all that work… I’m disappointed now 🙁
They glared at you??? They suck for that and for not coming around and bringing you swag and maybe offering to replace a light switch or two for inconveniencing the neighborhood. Liars. Users. Who needs them? Not us.
the elf costume toooootally makes up for the lame. elf trumps lame, always.
the elf costume toooootally makes up for the lame. elf trumps lame, always.
the carpenter has help? that is so utterly disappointing. i mean, i’m sure its impossible to get all that work done by themselves but it was cool thinking they could. especially amy. oh well.