If I had to title this one, I would title it “As The Thyroid Burns.”

Last week I started a higher dose of my thyroid medication (because the dose I was on was ineffective.)
I’m feeling rather frustrated and confused that after a week of taking a higher dose, I feel worse.
I don’t know how that’s possible, but it’s true.
My husband asked me how I was feeling now that my meds were adjusted. I could hear the hope in his tone. “You doing better, baby?” He asked with a smile on his face.
“No.” I said, fighting back tears.
I should have lied. I should have said that I feel SO MUCH BETTER! Because, honestly, I don’t know how he tolerates me anymore.
I feel as though I owe everyone in my life an apology for being so damn annoying. I really do.
There is so much that I want to say, but it’s all so boring and redundant and annoying, so I’ll just say that I’m not doing well and I don’t know that I’ll ever be well again because that’s how it feels this very moment. It feels very Soap Opera Serious and I actually want to say things like “The Hash&trade has robbed me of my life. I WANT MY GOD BLEEPING LIFE BACK.”

49 thoughts on “If I had to title this one, I would title it “As The Thyroid Burns.”

  1. tammy

    It can take several weeks to a month or so for the meds to help. Be patient. I know hypo-hell is miserable but you are on your way to getting better!

  2. Sally

    {{{big hugs}}} to you. my best friend also is hypothyroid & has been thru hell the last 6 months. she is finally starting to feel like something good is happening w/ her meds. you are gonna get there, too, girl. sending you tiny seeds of peace that grow & grow……

  3. Trixie

    So sorry, Y. I had a dream about you last night. I, too, live with thyroid disease and it’s really, really difficult to ever get the meds just right. It will take several months to find the right dosage. I do recommend the T3/T4 combination if you can do it. It worked the best for me, but I can’t afford it anymore. So it’s just plain synthroid for me now and it’s still requiring adjustment – 5 years later.
    I can pretty much promise you this: There will be great times ahead when your meds are just right! And there will be crappy times ahead when your meds just slightly off.
    I have 9 years of this hell under my belt if you ever need another chick to talk to about it.

  4. Scout's Honor

    Badass picture, woman.
    So, I’ve been feeling like you and all your thyroid talk has made me think I should see a doctor. Now, I’m a bit scared to…
    I hope you feel better.
    No advice. Just good thoughts coming your way.

  5. nava

    maybe now it’s too high? I know, so damn annoying. My mom and grandmother are both on thyroid meds; it’s frustrating to find the right level, and then have to do it all over again, and again, and again. sorry 🙁

  6. jonniker

    It will get better. I promise. It took me about a year, but it DID get better. Hang in there, and keep pushing your doctor (but remember, give it six weeks between doses to see how you *really* feel)

  7. Beth

    I don’t think you’re annoying. I think you’re hurting, and I wish I could help. But I do know you’re worth the effort it takes to feel better, and you deserve to be able to complain when you’re not feeling good. You are important. *hug*

  8. beth

    I’m so sorry you are feeling bad. Please give your meds more time to get into your system. This may take a few weeks. You WILL feel better.

  9. Tara

    It gets better. It really, truly does get better. It just takes time, frustrating and irritatingly slow time, some patience and a lot of awareness on your part.
    I have been struggling with thyroid issues for 7 years. I started out hyperthyroid with a nodule and was medicated (had a miscarriage due to the thyroid stuff), had half my thyroid removed in surgery and then went hypothyroid. During the six weeks after surgery, my doctor had me completely off meds and I truly felt like I had lost my mind. I was beyond tired, irritable and fatigued. Even after I went back on meds to regulate the hypo, it took at least six months for me to “feel normal” again. I look at pictures from those months and I was a puffy faced, tired zombie.
    I don’t mean to write a book here. I guess I just wanted you to know that it WILL get better. There is hope that your meds will get figured out and your body will come around.
    I have also learned that, even after things are somewhat regulated – it’s important to be aware of how you are feeling, trust yourself and your feelings and have your labs checked. I have been on the same dose of synthroid for three years, but have been so cold and fatigued lately. I had to really press my doctor to check me, and when we did, she insisted my labs were on the “normal” range. Only when I quizzed her on my past labs and normal variations, did she admit that my labs were way off what they normally were and they were just under the hypo range. They pushed up my meds a bit, but it’s been two weeks without much change. Again, it takes time for your body to work it out.
    It’s crazy how much influence the thyroid has on our physical and mental well being. I always thought I was nuts until I would get my labs back to validate my feelings.
    Hang in there – and know you are not alone!

  10. Dani

    Hey Y, how do you feel worse? Are you more tired? What are you feeling? We care! We want to hear! Try adding in a high potency vitamin b vitamin in the morning. I found that helps too!

  11. Moxie

    I just wanted to de-lurk for a moment to give you a hug.
    I too am going thru my own brand of seemingly never. ending. hell and sometimes I just need a hug. Especially those times when I just want a train to run me over because I am so sick and tired of feeling this way.
    So here is a big ((HUGG)) from some internet idiot lady. Please know that your posts help me tremendously because you are REAL and that I would be willing to bet that NONE of us expect anything other than the real Y.

  12. Lauri

    Lauri grabs Y by the shoulders and shakes her
    slap….. snap out of it…. ( going with the soap opera theme here) I am your tell it like it is friend with a great hair( slightly thinning ) & impeccable makeup who also has thyroid issues & shares your pain.
    after the slap ( for dramatic purposes) to bring you to your senses… I give you a big hug and dry your tears
    It will get better.. I promise….

  13. The Over-Thinker

    STOOPID DAMN hashimotos!! (make sure you whisper hashimotos–you don’t want to wake him)
    I’ll say a little prayer for you and hope you start to feel on the mend really soon.
    Did you know that sotomihsah is hashimotos backwards? Hmm? You did? Okay then. The so-toe-MEE-sah sounds even more whisperable.

  14. AA

    Don’t give up. And keep hounding your doctors. I had a friend with a thyroid problem and it took awhile to get everything right.

  15. AMomTwoBoys

    Pighunter and your kids, and us random internet people, LOVE YOU no matter what. Remember that. Just keep working at finding out what will work for you and things will look up.
    Plus, you have those giant stripper tah-tahs now, so that’s something that should make you smile, right?

  16. DeannaBanana

    Y, I know I repeat others here, but you will not feel better after one week. More like 4. I know it sucks, but it is so…persevere girlie, it’ll get better soon. Promise.

  17. Amy the Mom

    Boring? Never. If I thought you were boring I wouldn’t be compulsively clicking here a dozen times each day hoping desperately for new words from you. Wishing you well.

  18. Wacky Mommy

    Yes, several weeks or a month, unfortunately, is correct. Then they’ll tell you, “still not right we need to readjust! more bloodwork!” etc. Bastids.

  19. christina

    Hang in there, Y! Yes, indeed, it can take many months and you still may not end up feeling totally normal. I’ve had Hashimoto’s for over 30 years and I feel like crap on the dose I’m on now (and it has become VERY difficult to lose weight – if people tell you the weight just drops off when you take the hormones, don’t believe them. There’s a lot more to it than that) but if I increase it, I feel even worse. Go figure. Adding T3 might be an option for you if you’re not feeling at least a little bit better after 6 months or so.
    Things to avoid if you have Hashimoto’s:
    -soy products
    Things to supplement with:
    -bean dip 🙂
    I find this somewhat crazy site to be really informative

  20. Helen

    I even love you when you’re thinking you are whiney, I can’t say a word about the thyroid crap because I haven’t been there but I can talk about teenage daughters and gay sons and unmarried children about to have babies…would that help? Maybe lupus scratchy skin? Howabout 3 under 7 year olds, 2 of them are on the autism spectrum?
    Maybe not, am no help at all. Could send English chocolate though, now that WOULD help!

  21. Grammice

    I have friends who went through same thing with T-meds. They are good now, but felt like it was going to take a life time to get there. I did that with BP meds until they finally got it right.
    Good luck and there IS a LIGHT at the end of the tunnel.

  22. kristyk

    {{{hugs}}} I’ve been feeling the same way. I’m going in to the doctor next week for a test to see if I need a higher dose. F***ing thyroid.

  23. jen from boston

    I think it is safe to assume this disease is really getting on your last nervous.
    thinking of you.
    (p.s. speaking of which, thought of you as I saw the E! Grammy Fashion po-leece wrap up and who was an expert panelist than none other than Ms DAISY FUENTES!! HOLLA!)

  24. Marci

    So sorry to hear that you feel like crap. Hang in there. Sometimes these things take way too much time to figure out. Thinking about you and I send good vibes and healing prayers your way.

  25. Shelley

    Y- I just wanted to know that even though we are strangers…..that I was thinking of you and sending you positive vibes. What you are going through sucks…and it sucks so much more because of what a special, wonderful person you are.
    Many many hugs to you…

  26. gwendomama

    thyroid problems do take time (you may slap me for being redundant)…and you will still be there when it is finally regulated.
    but…seems to me that your doc is not only insensitive but also condescending and i would get another more compassionate doc on board if at all possible.

  27. Andrea

    We love you, Y, no matter what. We may be sad when the postings are infrequent, but then immediately we worry if you are okay. When your heart breaks, ours does too. The Internet is crazy like that, making all these connections among us.
    Here’s hoping & praying for some relief soon. God knows you deserve it!

  28. Heidi

    I check your blog every day just to see if you have something new to say. Please continue to write, even if it feels whiny. It’s good to get it out. We are all here reading your words because we want to be. Hope you feel better soon.

  29. Brandy

    Y, I am in the same place right now that you are. The Doc upped my thyroid meds and I feel MORE tired. But, it’s only been a week on the newer meds, so I’m holding out hope. That’s what I wish for you, hope. Lots of hugs to you!

  30. Kay

    I know you need/want instant relief but it takes longer than 1, 2 3 or even4 weeks even and still be normal. They can’t adjust you in too big a doses because then they can throw you into having a hyperactive thyroid problem but because of this, it takes awhile to get the cocktail right. In a month, you still don’t feel better, let your doc know, he will probably tell you the same thing unfortunately ( I KNow I was all FIX ME NOW!!!!) . I wish I could tell you it was instant relief but it is not. Hang in there!

  31. Kay

    Also you have to avoid iron, caffeine and other things within X many hours of taking your medicine. It contradicts it and acts as if you aren’t taking anything at all!

  32. Elizabeth

    I really know from experience what you are feeling. Others are right, hang in there. It takes a while for the meds to adjust…

  33. Auburn

    Sorry about your thyroid problems. That is rough and it seems to take a while before the “right” dose or medication is tweaked just right. Doesn’t make you feel any better but you aren’t alone in this hell! I don’t have thyroid problems but I have lupus and I used to be a size 6 as well. To tell you the truth, I looked like a skeleton at a size 6 and now all I want is to be healthy and eat healthier and I don’t even weigh myself anymore because it’s sabotage to me. Just love yourself and try to be healthy. *HUGS*

  34. Mom101

    Oh man, I know that feeling where you’re totally holding your shit together, and someone just looks at you kindly, asks you how you are, and you lose it.
    I would kick your thyroid’s ass if I could. If I were in LA. And if thyroids had asses.

  35. Tracey

    It is comforting that someone is going through the same emotions as I am. Although I do not have a thyroid problem, my health has been pitiful this winter and I am literally sick and tired of it. It helps to sound off every once in a while…
    Thanks for going public with your frustrations. It makes me feel like it is okay to be frustrated too.

  36. Tracy D

    Poor darling. I don’t comment often but I do read. And I think of you! I hope this medication will make you feel better soon. I am so sorry you are feeling bad!

  37. Kristen

    Oh, I understand. While I don’t have thyroid problems, I’m still the medical mystery as to what’s causing all of the, well, pelvic-area pain. It amazes me that my boyfriend still can stand being in the same apartment as me.
    I know it’s easier than it sounds, but hang in there. I have to believe that there’s some light at the end of this *bleeping* tunnel. 😉

  38. Kacey

    I absolutely hear you on the agony thyroid issues can cause. I’ve been struggling with hypothyroidism for the past 10 years. Have you read any of Mary Shomon’s books on thyroid issues? She also has a website – I believe its thyroid-info dot com. I hope you find something that works soon!

  39. cardiogirl

    Yes ma’am. Thyroid sufferer here. Mine was taken out ten years ago because cancer decided set up a shanty town in my thyroid. So I got nothin’ but the meds. And it SUCKS IT BIG TIME when they ain’t right. As you know.
    It also takes a good four to five weeks to feel better once they adjust them. Mine was too low so I was tired and itchy and feeling like I was walking under water. Then they were too high and I was bitchy and irritable and full of rage.
    Now (five weeks later) I’m no longer filled with rage, but I’m back on the dose that was too fricking low. So now I am once again tired and itchy and feeling like I am walking under water.
    And the fun part is that I take one pill every day and 1.5 on Sundays. That’s not enough.
    When it was too much and I was rageful, I was taking one pill every day and 2 on Sundays. Now these pills are small. I can’t cut it in 3/4s but that’s what I think I need on Sundays. Somewhere between half and a full pill.
    This makes me think I’m gonna have to take half on Sundays and on the third Sunday of every month I will take a full pill, standing on one leg while I pat my head.
    GAH! I hate my (lack of) thyroid! Grr.
    Long explanation — I feel your pain. It sucks.

  40. art

    feel so bad to hear your story. don’t worry, everything will be alright soon. at least u have a great husband there. try to look in positive side and try any other alternative medicines too. Who knows, miracles might happen anytime. I still believe in god.

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